They continue to still be out there. By now I am just annoyed by it. The laughing is getting old, almost as if it is life is mocking me.

I am thinking about shutting the window, but the cool breeze coming through it is nice….

** Also, I went out there, in lounge pajama wear, to pick some strawberries. At least that is something,

They are still out there, which means I probably won’t go out back until they aren’t there. Also, they’ve grown in numbers…:\

I live in a rather hip area in my city, which means a lot of young people. On my small section of the block, there are quite the handful of hipster-like young adults living in the houses surrounding mine.

For instance, a couple houses up the street are a group of kids, around my age, maybe even younger, that seemed like they moved in recently. Right now they are throwing a party in their backyard, a crab feast (something common in the area surrounding the Chesapeake Bay area, in and around Maryland). They are laughing, having fun, enjoying themselves.

And all I can think about is how I could be doing that. A twinge of jealousy. Though if that sort of situation presented itself to me I would be panicking or quietly stewing in my own anxiety about doing the right thing or not coming off as stupid.

Yep, they are all on their own, though. And what am I doing? Hiding away in my room, still living at home with my parents and have yet to have a job, letting my anxiety take over my body and eventually causing some other physical health problems, only causing me to not want to do anything. A viscous cycle.